Wedding jitters affect brides and grooms for a number of reasons. It’s not just about the wedding. Both sexes may fear the loss of their freedom, but women have it worse, even if they’re not conscious of it.
Women have more to lose by getting married
It’s the woman, not the man, who’s expected to change her name after marriage. Some women don’t feel great about that. I didn’t. After all, my name when I met my husband was the name I learned to write at age five. I can remember spelling it for the first time.
I didn’t want to lose it.
Maybe you don’t want to lose your name, either. Loss of identity (or its slow erosion) is a possibility that many women face when they find someone to love. If you’re about to get married, maybe this is an issue for you.
EFT/Tapping can help you gain clarity about the situation. Maybe you can feel better about changing your name. Maybe you’ll come up with the right words to tell your future husband you’re not going to change it.
Or, maybe changing your name doesn’t bother you. Your jitters are due to something else altogether. You could just be stressed about the politics of seating arrangements at your reception.
Whatever it is, EFT/Tapping can help you identify your fears and very often help you come up with the solutions to them. Best of all, it can help calm you.
(New to EFT/Tapping? Get free instructions and information here.)
Whatever the cause, EFT/Tapping can help ease wedding jitters
Is it possible you’re anxious about expectations to have children? Or about the changes parenthood will make to your life?
Even in 2017, women are generally considered the primary caregiver when children come into the picture, which will present situations you may have yet to fully consider. That doesn’t mean worries about them aren’t simmering under the surface.
For example, if you want to return to work after you have children, it’s usually the woman — even in this late age — who’ll oversee childcare. If you’re an executive, and your kid gets sick, it’s probably not your husband who’ll explain to colleagues while he’s leaving the office to take care of her.
Maybe this bothers you. If it does, please tap on it. See what comes up.
What if you don’t know what your problem is?
Sometimes we’re nervous about things we can’t articulate. We don’t even know what they are. In this case, it’s effective to tap on the feeling and see if anything concrete pops up.
For example, you can identify a physical feeling and tap on that. Give your jitters a color, if they have one. If they have a shape, name it. Do they have a texture? Where do you feel them? In your chest? Your stomach? Your head?
You don’t have to overthink anything. Just do your best. Tap on the fatty outer part of your hand and put together a set-up statement.
Even though I have this buzzy red circle in my stomach when I think about my wedding, I am willing to love and accept myself.
Repeat the statement three times. Then tap on the points:
This buzzy red circle in my stomach.
Complete a round and ask yourself what, if anything, is different. Has the circle changed shape? Location? Color? Has the buzz diminished, or has it been replaced with a different feeling? Has something concrete, like a rogue cousin you have to invite to the wedding, popped up?
Note the changes and tap again.
Do another round
Alter your set-up according to the changes you noted after the first round.
Even though I still have these wedding jitters, this buzzy red feeling– it’s smaller now, with blurrier edges–, and I’m worried about my cousin Angelo, what he might say to Mike, I am willing to love and accept myself.
Repeat three times. Then tap on the points using phrases that bring up the most emotion.
You might use a phrase like:
Angelo and Mike!
Tap until you bring the intensity down. Tap until something shifts. In most cases, you’ll get a hit of clarity.
As you continue, you may find out that you’re afraid Angelo might reveal to Mike something embarrassing about your past.
Keep tapping. See what comes up. Maybe it’ll be a smooth way to avoid the situation. If you can’t avoid it, you may find a way to mitigate it.
Keep tapping until you feel calm and confident. Bring down that intensity. The goal is to feel good and strong and tranquil in your skin again.
EFT/Tapping brings clarity
It’s easier to stop being nervous when we know what’s causing our distress. If we can identify it, we can handle it.
Let’s face it, we girls have been brought up from the moment we emerged from the womb to find a husband, but we can lose a lot when we do.
EFT can help you excavate your inner nudges and discern whether or not you’re marrying a man who will make your happiness a priority, and also how to navigate big and little fears, especially about marriage. We must be aware of what we’re getting into. Our lives depend on it.
Tapping can be a huge help.
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NOTE: The situations discussed above are examples, which may or may not apply to you. This post contains a link to The Tapping Solution, which provides solid self-help EFT instruction and of which I am proud to be a paid affiliate. However, some people prefer to work one-on-one with a certified practitioner. If that’s you, I’d love to work with you. Contact me here.